Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
