I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
