talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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