But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
