just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
