i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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