there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize