it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
