Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
He? As in you personified your dick?
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
