I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
