some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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