it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
