the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
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