Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
