Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
