I can't breathe out the right side of my face
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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