And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
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