I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
