i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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