just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize