At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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