Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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