She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special