sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
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