This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?