And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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