New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
