Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
