did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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