I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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