im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
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