Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
