I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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