I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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