Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Come on in and take your pants off
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