Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Randomize