I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
