I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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