no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
