dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
