the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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