And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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