That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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