i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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