did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
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