i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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