so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
