just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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