Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
