those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
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I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
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He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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